


The Pizza Debacle of '97

by nosecoffee



Category: Hamilton - Miranda
Genre: "I ordered pizza to the castle" AU, F/M, Hogwarts AU, M/M, Polyamorous relationship, Prompt Fic, Washington did you mean WashingDad
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-15
Updated: 2016-03-15
Packaged: 2018-05-26 21:28:49
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 691
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6256567
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nosecoffee/pseuds/nosecoffee
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Alternatively called "John Laurens Might Actually Be A God"</p><p>Basically John wakes his girlfriend and boyfriend up because he was a little shit and decided to order a supreme pizza to the castle and needs someone to share it with.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Pizza Debacle of '97

**Author's Note:**

> My friend requested a Hogwarts AU so here it is. I didn't have anything better to do anyway.

"You did what?!"

John was grinning and Eliza looked just about ready to shit her pants.

"No, no, John- HOW?"

His boyfriend shrugged. "I'm a master. I thought you knew this, Alexander."

"You're a fucking idiot is what you are!" Alex yelled, tackling the Gryffindor boy to the grass.

"You'll wake up the entire school, you two!" Eliza hissed at them, though she was still grinning.

"I can't help it, Liza," Alex whispered now, pinning John to the damp grass. "Our boyfriend ordered a pizza to the castle."

"I know," she said, sitting down and pulling John's head into her lap. He looked happy to be there, his thighs straddled by Alex's, pinned to the grass in the middle of the night, outside his favourite place on earth.

"How are you gonna pay for it?" Alex asked, his ear pressed to John's chest so he could hear the gentle beat of his heart.

John chuckled. "My dad is very Muggle money savvy, so I have some on me."

Alex sighed, snuggling in closer, his nose pressed to John's sweater. Eliza's hands were in their hair running softly until she heard the ring of a bike-bell and nudged her boyfriends so they'd get up and walk down to the gate with her.

The Muggle delivery boy looked super creeped out, delivering pizza to what appeared to him as a creepy, old, abandoned castle. And a little freaked when three kids in school uniform that he'd never seen before appeared and offered him money in exchange for the supreme pizza.

He looked grateful to get away from there.

They moved back up the lawn to the castle holding the warm box, and shivering in excitement, awaiting the moment they got back to John's mostly empty dorm.

Of course they stopped short a few corridors away when Professor Washington rounded the corner, the Lumos charm on the tip of his wand and it was too late for them to hide so the three of them just stood in an awkward line, Alex holding the box of pizza, all looking guilty, but also proud.

"What are you three doing up at this hour? And with-" Washington cut himself off, moving closer and sighing as he registered the box. "Pizza."

The professor was still fully dressed, surprisingly, and looking a little more tired than usual.

"I'm afraid, Mr Hamilton, Mr Laurens, Miss Schuyler, that I'm going to have to confiscate this. And put you all in detention, effective, immediately."

They groaned collectively and Washington gestured for them to follow him down the corridor to his office. He lit some candles and they all sat on the other side of his desk.  
  
He placed the box on the desk, and opened it.

"Supreme, huh?"

John nodded numbly.

Washington sat back in his chair. "Then by all means, dig in."

And they were reminded how much they loved him, lunging for the pizza John had procured for them.

* * *

 

"Is it true that John actually ordered Pizza to the castle last night?" Hercules asked, his lips close to Alex's ear.

Alex smirked. "Wouldn't you like to know."

"I would, actually," replied the broad-shouldered Hufflepuff. "I just wanna know if it's true or not."

"Who told you?" Alex asked, suspiciously.

"Laf. Apparently John had a pizza box stuffed under his pillow. I figured since you're his boyfriend and all, you'd know.

"Well, I do know, and John is miraculous in a way I can't explain-"

"Dude-"

"But yes he did. But you can't tell anyone, cause the only reason we got out unscathed was cause Washington caught us sneaking back into the castle and his us while we are."

Hercules laughed, drawing the attention of some Ravenclaw second years, who walked quicker when he flashed them his stunningly white teeth, in a feral smile.

"That's great, dude. Inspired. I wouldn't do it again though."

"And why not?" Hercules tugged on Alexander's blue tie.

"Cause next time the Ministry will be on you like flies. Stick to making out in the kitchens and getting it on in the change rooms."

He left Alex speechless in the corridor, hurrying to class.

 

Fin.

**Author's Note:**

> My Tumblr is @nose-coffee, feel free to send me prompts, and comments give me strength to keep writing and posting this crap for you guys. Thanks to Kayden for A) putting up with me B) requesting this C) being amazing altogether.
> 
> UPDATE: Hey so, I'm officially naming this fic "The Beginning of the Hogwarts AU I Will Write When I Get Around To Finishing All My Other Fics so Yeah". If that sounds interesting to you, please leave a comment and I'll finish up my other series'/fics (IKEA AU, Ghost Jefferson AU, Tall Dark and Sweet, and maybe even Your Favourite Younger Sister, but that'll probably never die.) Thanks for stopping to read this, and I hope you stop to read some of my other fics! Thanks!


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